heidiv
New Poster
Cash: $ 0.45
Posts: 2
Joined: 09 May 2005
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| Help getting out of debt |
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I'm sorry if this is not an appropriate way to post this and ask for guidance. I didn't know where else to turn. We are experiencing a horrendous financial crisis right now. I am praying for a financial miracle, or in reality, bankruptcy may be my only option. I'm praying that other alternatives may be out there, in the interest of not bringing my family down with me. While I never anticipated being in the position that we are now and never felt I would reach the point of despair that would result in me publicly asking for help, I feel a sense of peace that it is alright to do so. I have felt as though I have lost all hope. I have been on the verge of suicide. In our current state, it has seemed a somewhat reasonable way out. The insurance monies available would be more than enough to pay off debts and provide a comfortable living for my family. I am a very spiritual woman, however, and I know the Lord would not wish for me to entertain such thoughts. My children and husband need me and entertaining such thoughts is nothing but selfish. I take large responsibility for the trouble we have encountered, in that I am not particularly financially savvy. I have made significant strides, however, in my attempts to improve our situation. I rarely spend anything anymore and have discontinued the use of all credit cards. In addition to my previous poor judgment, however, we have experienced a number of unexpected circumstances that have further bleakened our outlook. My husband has had to undergo multiple surgeries and resulting periods of unemployment. He has also suffered tremendous depression and resulting alcoholism. We were also in a terrible predicament as we were unable to sell our home, after moving, and forced to pay two mortgages for a period of 1 ½ years. We are very blessed, however, as my husband has been sober for 1 ½ years now. To stay afloat, I have taken on additional part-time jobs. I have also returned to school to further my education and future employment options. Regrettably, however, it seems everything is too late, as we have amassed over 70,000 in debt and now, despite the fact that we are both healthy and gainfully working again, we are completely unable to pay all of our bills. The creditors call daily and the stress associated with that makes us physically ill. I constantly experience migrains and nausea. We are at risk for loosing everything. I have received notice that our car may be repoessessed. Without a car, I will be unable to even work. I am also getting behind on our mortgage. I have succumbed to taking out payday loans, just to make other payments, which only in turn makes me unable to pay the payday loans. The cycle has become unmanageable. We are clearly a family in crisis. If I could just generate enough funds to pay off my payday loans and catch up on current bills I would be able to rebudget everything and regain our lives. Right now, the payday rollercoaster is pushing us further and further behind. I have spoken with a debt management company and they are able to restructure everything for us and help us, but they are unable to work with the payday lenders. Every direction I turn seems to result in upset.
Despite our financial turmoil, God has blessed us in so many ways. We have wonderful children and a roof over our heads, at least for now. My husband, fortunately, has not left me yet, for my inability to handle our finances. I know that with a little help, we can improve our life and our situation. As I previously mentioned, I have discontinued the use of all of our credit cards and we are striving to live only on cash. I am grateful for the opportunity to take on additional work, I just regret the fact that it takes me away from my family for even longer time frames and it doesn’t seem to get us ahead any faster. We are really trying to improve our bottom line, but do not seem to be able to tackle this on our own. I know we are in God’s hands. Thank you for your willingness to listen. I so appreciate any prayer you are able to provide, as well as any suggestions you may offer. As a last resort, I established a donation page @ the URL listed below. I was hoping caring, prayerful people would be able to help. So far, it has encouraged only non-believers, pretending to be believers, attempting to scam me and bring me down further. Perhaps your prayers will send some able individuals our way.
Thank you so much and God bless you!
http://donatemoney2me.com/Please-Donate/HV6F3T9.htm
God Bless You-
Heidi
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Mon May 09, 2005 11:31 am |
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Kolya
Member
Cash: $ 4.70
Posts: 24
Joined: 03 May 2005
Location: North Carolina
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If you are seriously contemplating suicide, why would bankruptcy be a secondary option? I know it may seem overwhelming at this point.
I remember whn I was younger my parents accrued over $90,000 in Credit card debt. The phones rang off the hook, they would tell me not to answer it if it was a number that was unknown.
They filed for bankruptcy and that was years ago. Sure, they don't have certain things like they used to and they can't get unsecured credit, but they aren't frazzled like they were then. And they've learned to live within their means.
I understand that you may just need to get caught up in your current bills and such, but in reality, I don't know you from an automated response to an email and your story comes off mostly as a scam to get easy money. I know you'll reply to this with a genuine response about how you've never done this before and just need a leg up on the situation, but take ressponsibility. Nobody forced you to use your credit cards. If Bankruptcy is the only answer than accept your fate and do it.
Whatever you do, don't leave your children without a mother just becasue you didn't handle your debt well. You'll look back in your life and realize how stupid the thought of that even was.
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Mon May 09, 2005 2:28 pm |
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handicap
Full Member
Cash: $ 8.62
Posts: 67
Joined: 02 Apr 2005
Location: Currently in London
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Kolya, you've taken the words from my mouth. Well said and ditto.
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Mon May 09, 2005 2:35 pm |
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Riz
Contributing Member
Cash: $ 5.30
Posts: 27
Joined: 22 Mar 2005
Location: San Francisco
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Kolya,
You also took the words right out of my mouth.
Heidiv,
Your story is very sad, (if it's true). Hopefully it is not. But if it is, your type of situation is exactly why Bankruptcy is in existence. It is for those people who make (ginuinely) financial mistakes and can't get out. I just do see how you could contimplate suicide, yet is scared to claim bankruptcy. My advice would be be responsible and make the necessary decision that is going to bring happiness and security to your family.
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Mon May 09, 2005 4:29 pm |
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heidiv
New Poster
Cash: $ 0.45
Posts: 2
Joined: 09 May 2005
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Thank you to all of you who replied. I guess you put me in my place. I don't think it's particularly unusual to contemplate suicide, when you feel you have no hope. Your comments made me feel more like an idiot than I already do. That's my problem, however. I guess I'm just too sensitive. The reason that I temporarily felt like suicide might be a better option than bankruptcy is because in my emotional state, I felt my life insurance funds would support my family and they wouldn't have to worry about anything again. As I stated, however, in my posting, my spiritual beliefs have prevented me from doing that. In terms of me coming across as a scam, I guess I can understand why you would feel that way, although as someone who genuinely trusts everybody, and as someone who has been personally scammed, it bothers me to be viewed that way. I'm really not looking for a handout, rather just advice. The reason I took out the donation page is because of the savekaryn.com website several months ago. She posted her story and was successful in receiving support. I thought I would give it a try. Thank you for offering advice. I appreciate the fact that you read my story and offered input. Have a great day!
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Mon May 09, 2005 8:53 pm |
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networking101
Member
Cash: $ 1.02
Posts: 12
Joined: 02 Jun 2005
Location: US
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Hello Heidiv,
I'm sure this is hard for you and your family. Let me break this down about the suicide thing though. Do you actually think your husband and children want to live with the fact that there mother committed suidice because she could not handle the emotion financial strain? By doing this you will probably cause emotion problems within your loved ones which guess what will lead to alcholism, depression, drugs and yes more debt. So for the quick financial fix keep in mind it would only be temporary. If your post is genuine and there is no other options to correct this then by all means file bankruptcy and rebuild your life rather then end it. Ending your life should never be an option. Think of it this way no matter how bad things might get there is someone out there in a worse situation then yourself.
Best of Luck.
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Fri Jun 03, 2005 10:58 pm |
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cumbrlnd
New Member
Cash: $ 0.65
Posts: 3
Joined: 26 May 2005
Location: Bakersfield, CA
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It can be overwhelming. What you have to do is take a deep breath and realize that you had a part in the problem so you have a part in the solution. One great option is to first seek medical treatment. Depression is a serious thing and when that is the priority in your life you can't clearly see any other solutions....
Next consider the bankruptcy. But also realize it is not the cure for the problem. You are. You are the only one that can change your behavior and attitude about money. Next consider your local Consumer Credit Councling they will help you creat a realistic budget for your family.
Good luck. 
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Thu Jun 23, 2005 8:26 am |
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MattL
Senior Member
Cash: $ 46.85
Posts: 234
Joined: 25 Jun 2005
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You need financial counseling. They will help you to deal with your current debt, negotiate with collectors and the emotional turmoil that this causes. They will also help you with a plan to help prevent this from happening again.
There are free consumer credit counseling services available. Look them up in the phone book and make an appointment...TODAY!
Debt Elimination
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Mon Jun 27, 2005 11:23 am |
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SOLNET5
Member
Cash: $ 3.40
Posts: 15
Joined: 16 Apr 2005
Location: NEW JERSEY
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| Re: Help getting out of debt |
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quote:
Originally posted by heidiv
I'm sorry if this is not an appropriate way to post this and ask for guidance. I didn't know where else to turn. We are experiencing a horrendous financial crisis right now. I am praying for a financial miracle, or in reality, bankruptcy may be my only option. I'm praying that other alternatives may be out there, in the interest of not bringing my family down with me. While I never anticipated being in the position that we are now and never felt I would reach the point of despair that would result in me publicly asking for help, I feel a sense of peace that it is alright to do so. I have felt as though I have lost all hope. I have been on the verge of suicide. In our current state, it has seemed a somewhat reasonable way out. The insurance monies available would be more than enough to pay off debts and provide a comfortable living for my family. I am a very spiritual woman, however, and I know the Lord would not wish for me to entertain such thoughts. My children and husband need me and entertaining such thoughts is nothing but selfish. I take large responsibility for the trouble we have encountered, in that I am not particularly financially savvy. I have made significant strides, however, in my attempts to improve our situation. I rarely spend anything anymore and have discontinued the use of all credit cards. In addition to my previous poor judgment, however, we have experienced a number of unexpected circumstances that have further bleakened our outlook. My husband has had to undergo multiple surgeries and resulting periods of unemployment. He has also suffered tremendous depression and resulting alcoholism. We were also in a terrible predicament as we were unable to sell our home, after moving, and forced to pay two mortgages for a period of 1 ½ years. We are very blessed, however, as my husband has been sober for 1 ½ years now. To stay afloat, I have taken on additional part-time jobs. I have also returned to school to further my education and future employment options. Regrettably, however, it seems everything is too late, as we have amassed over 70,000 in debt and now, despite the fact that we are both healthy and gainfully working again, we are completely unable to pay all of our bills. The creditors call daily and the stress associated with that makes us physically ill. I constantly experience migrains and nausea. We are at risk for loosing everything. I have received notice that our car may be repoessessed. Without a car, I will be unable to even work. I am also getting behind on our mortgage. I have succumbed to taking out payday loans, just to make other payments, which only in turn makes me unable to pay the payday loans. The cycle has become unmanageable. We are clearly a family in crisis. If I could just generate enough funds to pay off my payday loans and catch up on current bills I would be able to rebudget everything and regain our lives. Right now, the payday rollercoaster is pushing us further and further behind. I have spoken with a debt management company and they are able to restructure everything for us and help us, but they are unable to work with the payday lenders. Every direction I turn seems to result in upset.
Despite our financial turmoil, God has blessed us in so many ways. We have wonderful children and a roof over our heads, at least for now. My husband, fortunately, has not left me yet, for my inability to handle our finances. I know that with a little help, we can improve our life and our situation. As I previously mentioned, I have discontinued the use of all of our credit cards and we are striving to live only on cash. I am grateful for the opportunity to take on additional work, I just regret the fact that it takes me away from my family for even longer time frames and it doesn’t seem to get us ahead any faster. We are really trying to improve our bottom line, but do not seem to be able to tackle this on our own. I know we are in God’s hands. Thank you for your willingness to listen. I so appreciate any prayer you are able to provide, as well as any suggestions you may offer. As a last resort, I established a donation page @ the URL listed below. I was hoping caring, prayerful people would be able to help. So far, it has encouraged only non-believers, pretending to be believers, attempting to scam me and bring me down further. Perhaps your prayers will send some able individuals our way.
Thank you so much and God bless you!
http://donatemoney2me.com/Please-Donate/HV6F3T9.htm
God Bless You-
Heidi
Heidiv,
Don't be afraid of filing bankruptcy. It is a road we don't enjoy taking but it has it advantage. It will give you a new start.
Get some advice before filing.
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Sat Jul 02, 2005 11:28 pm |
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